THe saddest day in my LIFe!

Welcome to my life...

Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you

Do you ever wanna runaway?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming
No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
With no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desparate to find something more?
Before your life is over

Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you're bleeding

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
With no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

No one ever lied straight to your face
No one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay
Everybody always gave you what you wanted
Never had to work it was always there

You don't know what it's like
what it's like

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
With no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like, what it's like
Welcome to my life

Hantu Computer?!

Have you ever heard of such Ghost as "Hantu Computer"? I just discovered them yesterday. My luck was not this good lately and i terserempak this ghost. HE haunts all my three computers and reallly blow me off.
First, the computer at home... my connection was very bad for the past few days i thought it was due to the weather or something... till last night i really cant take it anymore... I cant login to my my MSN messenger and my connection was only 9.4kb so i uninstalled the whole MSN 6.1 and was planning to reinstall... Just when the words "Uninstalled successful" appeared i reveived a MSN messenger message from my friend... AIKS!!! I got a shocked!! THe MSN icon no longer there, he wasnt supposed to still see me online cos I am no longer on MSN... This is weird... That's when i discovered the "Hantu Computer"...
2nd, I received a call from my friend last night telling me that i just sent him an email contents Virus... The email was about collecting donation for a girl who has some sorts of cancer every email you forward you will get 3 cents for her... so i forwarded the email hoping that I could help her somehow or rather... My friend told me that it is actually a tricks to send virus... These ppl are really fuck up... so dont be too nice, ppl will just take advantage of you... I was angry with myself too for not reading the mail properly... But what to do? when the ghost want to haunt you, nothing you can do??!! Now i am worrying the computer in my office... If kena virus, Haha!!! Dead....!!!
Hmm... in Chinese calendar it is now July (which is Ghost Month), this is when all the hungry ghosts will come out and find food... Now only i discovered that actually Hantu Computer can be quite scary too... so feed your computer and get them some protections.... GOOD LUCKS!

Everything

I can be an asshole of the grandest kind
I can withhold like it's going out of style
I can be the moodiest baby and you've never met anyone
Who is as negative as I am sometimes

I am the wisest woman that you've never met
I am the kindest soul with whom you've connected
I have the bravest heart that you've ever seen and you've never met anyone
Who is as positive as I am sometimes

You see everything and you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can't relate
And you're still here

I blame everyone else not my own partaking
My passive aggressive-ness can be devastating
I'm terrified and mistrusting and you've never met anyone
Who is as closed down as I am sometimes

What i resist persists and speaks louder than i know
What i resist you love no matter how low or high i go

I'm the funniest woman that you've ever known
I am the dullest woman that you've ever known
I'm the most gorgeous woman that you've ever known and you've never met anyone
who is as everything as I am sometimes

Everything as I am

This is the second time I am writing for this topic... I wrote it this afternoon but stupid i lost everything when I got disconnected... I don't know how but it lost...
The lyrics below "Everything" is one of my favourite songs at the moment... The lyrics is so meaningful and it is so true.... No one is perfect in this world and no one is the worst... everyone has got the good and the bad side of themselves... the only matter is how many ppl can actually notice and appreciate the good side of you? And, how many ppl can actually tolerance and compromise with the bad sides of you? Can your ex-boyfriend notice your kind hearted and your sincerity? Or can he tolerance you being demanding? He can't... If he can do that he won't be your ex.... The person we love, we tried to give in to them... We tried hard to learn them and read them like a book... In the end, what happen? There is a limit, until certain extend one of them will just blow off like a bomb and everything fell apart... Time wasted, energy wasted, both sides get so exhausted after all the arguments... It is not easy to to accept a person 100% as who they are... It is about give and take... and a lot of patience and time... This song makes me think a lot... I have been wondering who is the person who is going to accept me as who I am? At this point of time... my family.... I made a lot of mistakes and i broke their heart... I know they were disappointed with me but they forgive me... they still love me and still giving me a chance to stand up and walk again... they give me support directly and indirectly... so matter what happen... family is still a family... they are always stand by you through thick and thin... Another person who has accepted me as who I am are my 2 close friends.... One of them is my primary school friends... we are still as close as before... even though we are so far apart, we still keep in touch and still share almost everything... we talk a lot and he is always there to support me... he is getting married and i know nothing will stop our friendship from growing... another one is my friend from Penang... we got to know each when we were in Melbouren.... we are also far apart.. but our heart still stick together and always stand by me when i need her.... I feel lucky to have such friends and supports... Now... I am wondering if my future Prince Charming gonna accept me as who i am for the rest of our lives.... If he can... can I accept him as who he is? Headache huh? :P

My first time

This is my first time creating a homepage for myself... I have a lot of ideas on what to share in here with my friends but the thing is i dont know if i have the patience...hahahahah!! I am gonna write it in English because my Chinese not so good and not like my English is damn good... I can speak fluent Mandarin because i speak Mandarin at home... but when come to writing I am more fluent in Broken English... hahahhahah!!
I am not going to let a lot of ppl know about my homepage cos malu lah..... if you are reading it... then youa re someone special to me... ;) So, thank you for reading.... and excuse my language if there is any vulgar words.... cos i supposed there must be some here and there.... :P